Wednesday, April 27, 2005

A call to arms: Mass mailing the mass mailers!

Fellow recipients of junk mail the time has come to launch a holy crusade against the NO ANNUAL FEE, 0% introductory interest rate for Six months an all balances credit card company mailings. These wasteful and deceptive mailings serve no purpose other than to annoy me and make a mess on my floor because I refuse to pick them up.

Today as I walked in my door and saw tens of these obnoxious things on the floor- a grand idea came to me. I decided I would open them up and fill the postage paid reply envelope with everything they had sent me, including the original envelope. So I opened it ripped off all pages that had my name, so as to avoid a retaliatory massive influx of mail, and proceed to fill it up with each piece of paper they had sent me. As I was finishing the first one, I noticed that I had some subway coupons so included them. I think I just made someone's day over at Chase Bank.

The next envelope included relevant pages from a dell catalogue, a business card for a local Gardener and some coupons from some other junk mail. Over the next 15 minutes, I noticed my floor becoming cleaner as much of the junk mail was being stuffed into these reply envelopes.

Thus I call on all of you to send back the envelopes, stuff them if you wish or mail them back empty. Simply just mail them back.


If enough people do this the costs of this nuisance will be raised to intolerable levels through (I)increased postage the companies will have to pay, this helps the postage workers;
(ii) each of these envelopes has to be opened which means someone will be hired to do it, thus providing employment;
(iii) it is environmentally friendly that way the company can reuse things that are sent back. (and who said i would never do something for mother earth?!)





- The evil genius.


Feel free to post how many and to whom you sent them in the comment section.

Please do not violate any laws by sending anything offensive, illegal, or disgusting. Stick to things you have received in the mail. (basically just paper- with nothing offensive on it).

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